so here we go...

The start to a whole brand new week

yes I know it's Sunday

but I like to start over on Sunday's

because I don't like Sunday's

never have probably never will!!!

After I posted yesterday

i got up and literally

made my bed.

clean sheets

pillows plumped and fluffed to within an inch of their lives

then I made eggs and ham

for

brunch

and at some point pulled out a kitchen chair and found a box of bulbs

that I had bought a couple of weeks ago and forgotten about

how they got on the chair

...

we won't try to figure that out!!!

anyway

inside the box were three bulbs,

paperwhites,

growing in the dark

they want to live

so I potted them

(and there they are

in the sunshine this morning

growing)

how sweet and how full of life they are.

I sat down in the living room and took up the needles once again

and tried three patterns that caught my eye

(photos later)

then I tried another stitch I had seen somewhere and remembered how to do

and did that too!!

nothing like coming back with a roar

so four different patterns on the needles

a stupid

"destroy the planet" crap movie on TV

and

she's back

:) :) :)

today for lunch I made some ham and cheese and tomatoes

 on bread filled with seeds and nuts

 and

oats

yum!

visited a few blogs and Flickr

things are vewy vewy quiet

around those parts

started dinner

and made a cup of tea

which was left again because when I went outside to get a breath of air

and

this is what was over me

hawks

circling over head

drifting in circles

round and round

and

round

from the front to the back

silent hunters

in the sky

hope their prey

looks not like

.......

I

see ya!!!!

:)

The last time..

I saw my father he told me something

that I have to remember when I get stuck and ....

torpid!!!!!!!

:).

We were sitting in the breakfast room

as we called it

and I was about to come back here.

He simply said

you make your bed , you have to lie in it.

I had a dream the other night

about this very thing.

I always think that this last time that I was with him

was the last time, but I didn't know it
 and somehow I think he did.

He and my mother were supposed to come and visit us after I had my first son,

but Daddy got sick and never made it.

When I talked to him after I got home from the hospital

he asked me how Johnathan was

I asked who is Jonathan

he said your son

that isn't his name was my reply

and

I never thought to ask why he said that name

I didn't know for years and years later that his fathers name was

Johnathan

that is my grandsons name

because my son remembered me telling that story a time or two

My father had cancer and I wasn't there for any of it
but the very beginning when they were doing tests
but I never imagined then how long it would be
and how he must have suffered

he was "sick" for quite a while
and
 I have a letter he wrote me right before he was supposed to have a

big operation

he speaks of making it through and soaring like an eagle

he made it through

but it didn't cure him

he died three weeks before they were to visit
and I wasn't there

My mother came a few weeks later

and met her first grandchild for the first time

my son was very ill

some stupid idiotic moron of a doctor had overdosed him

 and we nearly lost him

so when my mother arrived

I was in a state and so was she

but as it does

it all worked out and she got to be a

grandmother to a little boy who adored her

she spent a lot of time with all of her grandchildren

three grand sons

and she was a good grandmother

even though her daughters didn't always think so

but the grandsons never got to meet

the man we so often told them about

the man with the very long name

that spelled his first name

JACK

Jack Albany Clarence  Kipling Barnes

and his surname

don't remember why the Barnes.....but the others were dukes and I think Rudyard, maybe!!

:) :) :)

!!!!

I have often fantasised about how it would have been if they had ever met

he would have been such a neat grandpa

he was funny and gentle

he was good with his hands

he had patience

and I know this because he had

three females in his life who were a hand full

we had some friends whose father had left them

and my Dad kind of became a surrogate dad to them

I used to wish that I could have heard him

call my boys

"son"

the way he used to call our friends that

I just wish my boys could have known him

and when things used to get hairy

having teenage boys about

I did tell them once in a while

that they had made their beds.......

wonder if they will tell their children that too

The reason I tell you this tale

is

I did make my bed

and I will lie in it

and I will remember that my father would expect me
to do the best I can do with what I have

and what I have is nothing to dismiss

or complain about

I have so much more than so many
so I will remember to be
 grateful
....
that I didn't have to live in the desert
and have nothing to eat
but cheese and jam

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

:) :) :) :)



no title..

I feel as though I have been struck dumb

I have accomplished absolutely nothing this week

as far as any projects

I cannot concentrate on anything for very long

It will pass I know.... so for now....

silence is best

:)

I started going through the photos I have, in all the messy files here on the computer

I name them and then try to remember what the hell I called them

so the files

grow and grow

I have some that I have taken from the Internet

and here are some of them

I don't remember or know where they came from

inspiration

longing for order in the chaos

peace and calm to take effect

everything in its place

a place to gather thoughts and get on with it

humour...

always

"SOMETIMES THE CHAINS THAT PREVENT US FROM BEING FREE, ARE MORE MENTAL THAN PHYSICAL

don't forget to

and use your imagination

always

:}

too much thinking on a thursday

so a few more photos from yesterday

up close and personal...

I wrote a long post about the goings on here at the moment

and got myself all fired up and very very verbose

as is my way

and thank goodness

for you!!!

the cat came in and insisted that she needed to be fed

and fed

NOW....

so I got up and fed her majesty

and while I was in the kitchen

I made myself a cup of tea

the lake is frozen in spots

and there are a lot of ducks and geese on it

all afternoon flocks of them have been flying in

and each time they do I grab the camera and

miss the whole flight in and landing on the ice

they are very loud and sound so mournful

I have lamented to the hubs on many an occasion

how I would love to catch them in flight

and he says

you will

one day

well people's

today was the day

I hurried outside while looking to put the camera on some sort of zoom lens

and found something called digital zoom and just clicked it

tea forgotten

no shoes or coat

off I flew

and saw the one we call

HONKER

next door

he hissed a hello

and I told him not to be so rude

and walked down to the back

how he got there so fast I don't know

but there he is with his mate/friend/sibling

and the

Canada Geese too

then I heard the noise above

and there they were

over my head

and do they move fast

honking honking honking

always

egging each other on

supporting the group to make it down for the night

where they will be safe and able to rest

until they have to move on

the sun is setting

and it is so pretty

I love it at this time of day

with the sky mirrored in the water

Honker wanted to know what I was doing

so close and personal

and then he just ignored me

they are eating the grass and maybe some bugs in the leaf litter

this lot look a little lost and forlorn

and maybe their feet are cold

I know mine were

but I tried my best for you

to get a little closer

and show you

my little creatures on the lake

I am still fired up and so fed up with human behaviour

but

as always

my little sweet ones 

 make me smile and feel better

I'll put a few more up in another post

these took an age to load

so there you are

peace and community

working

even if for just a  little while